The Diary Of Masaki Kurosaki
by DetroitBleachWings
Summary: Ichigo and Rukia are making daughter Masaki keep a diary....oh this is going to go well. Same characters as A Bond That Transcends Time, different story though
1. Chapter 1

**Ok so in a convo with Bleachlovergirl I was inspired so I wrote this. It will be updated periodically, not a giant priority lol, but if i think of somethign. **

**NOTE: Same characters as A Bond That Transcends Time....but not from the story, same characters different world ^ ^**

**Im going to assume you know all the characters, and if not theres a list on my profile. Enjoy ^ ^ well be seeing a different side of Masaki in this fic, the side that makes you know that shes Ichi and Rukis daughter ^ ^**

**I dont own bleach...blah blah blah....LOOK A MONKEY**

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The Diary Of Masaki Kurosaki

_Entry 1_

So ok I know what you're thinking right? Why is the beautiful 17 year old shinigami Masaki Hisana Kurosaki keeping a journal now? Well it's pretty simple. My parents are making me. My dad says that I should keep track of the major events in my life, seeing as how there are so many of them. Nothing exciting has happened since we discovered our parents were shinigami too, other than finding out that my mother is expecting….again. Seriously what is she a rabbit? She's going to live forever and my dad's knocked her up 4 times in 17 years. Not only that but now she's having twins.

Hey dad it's called a condom ever heard of it?

Sigh, but I digress. So ya I'm being forced to keep this stupid journal. At least mom bought it for me. It's pink with chappy all over it, it's so kawaii! The only thing is that I have to keep Renji out of it. That little bastard will read it and rat me out on everything! Assuming mom and dad are not going to read it as it is…

Ok damnit I need a good hiding place for this thing….hmmm. I'll think of one later.

So I guess for the first 'major event' I'll go back to a moment in school today.

_School_

"Hey hot stuff you up for a date later?" some snobby looking senior asked me. Seriously something about human men is such a turn off, maybe since dating a shinigami runs in the family. I could definitely tell this guy was a pig by looking at him. I could tell he's done more than his fare share of girls in the school, and was probably paying some cheerleader child support. I didn't want anything to do with him, so I turned him down as politely as I could.

"Piss off I'm taken."

That was nice wasn't it?

Ok no it wasn't but I really just wanted to get away from this guy. Me and Riley had made plans to see the "Adventures of Chappy the Rabbit: Undersea Adventure" today after school.

"What did you just say to me bitch?" he growled. Ok, now I was pissed. I turned around and made my best angry face, which my parents always told me I was too cute to make. It was more like a pout I suppose but I don't get mad that often. He walked up to me and I gave him the Kuchiki glare, which I was much better at doing. I actually scared dad into submission once while I was PMSing. I seriously thought he was gonna wet himself.

But again I digress.

He reached me and grabbed my arm.

"I asked you if you wanted to go out later, and when I say ask, I mean you're going out with me later." Yep…this guy is definitely from the 'me' generation. My Kuchiki glare was failing me…damn it, so it was time for plan B….kick his ass.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not a violent person. In fact I hate violence. However that doesn't mean I'm not good at it. Usually I just don't have to since Riley is there kick ass for me, but today she had left early to get our tickets and I was on my own. Daddy always says I got my amazing abilities from him, but then mommy usually kicks him and says that he lies. I swatted away his hand and gave him a final warning.

"I'm not going to tell you again…leave me alone" I tried the Kuchiki glare again. Alas it failed…remind me to get uncle Byakuya to come up with a new glare and the dude then punched me.

Yes…this bastard _punched me….._

It's time to die.

I thrust my hand into his chest and pushed myself off, using the force to do a back flip, kicking him straight in the jaw and landing flawlessly behind where I was. He flew into the air and slow motion fell, giving me an opportunity to swipe him from below, crouching and bring my leg around in a circle, sending him down the hallway.

Mission accomplished.

I got up and smiled confidently, walking out of the school with a smile on my face.

I am awesome…

Until I tripped on my shoelace…

_Ichigo and Rukia that night_

"What are we going to do with her Ichigo…" Rukia slapped her forhead.

"By her Velcro shoes…."

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_Entry 2_

So ok I think mom and dad are reading this thing, especially since I thought I could smell the sex on it.

Come on now it's so obvious you guys, you can't keep your hands off each other.

So mom asked me if I could take Kyoko and her BFF Mimi Cifer to dance class today.

Her and Orihime were on a shopping adventure today.

So I called Sosuke and asked if he wanted to come with me, we don't get to hang out just the 2 of us to much. Not to mention I think there's some stuff he wants to ask me. He said sure and I grabbed Kyoko and her things and walked towards Sosuke and Mimi's house. Kyoko was skipping happily behind me and I was happily humming a new song I heard on the radio when we reached the Cifer household. Sosuke and Mimi then joined us and the 2 young girls walked behind us.

We got to the dance studio and Kyoko and Mimi got into their shoes and started doing their dance…thing. I turned to my good old freshman buddy, the beautiful Sosuke Cifer and asked what was on his mind.

"What the hell is going on with you and Shaolin?"

I really should work on beating around the bush a little more. Mama says I'm to direct with everyone.

"Well you can probably tell that I see her as more than a friend" Sosuke looked away. I put my hands to my cheeks and faked a gasp.

"No fucking way I never saw that one coming!" I feigned.

"Suck it" Sosuke glared. I just giggled.

"Ya so what's your point?"

"You're a girl, what should I do?" I could tell her was being dead serious about this and smiled to him.

"You know Shaolin's not a normal girl right?" I laughed.

"Neither are you which is why I'm asking" Sosuke stated plainly…until I decked him.

But hey now, I do detest violence.

"My best advice is to just be sweet and tell her. That's how my boyfriend got me" I smiled.

"I thought you to randomly met and had a crazy one night stand and fell in love?" Sosuke coked his head, honestly believing that.

"WHO THE HELL TOLD YOU THAT!" I shouted, earning a parade of shushes from the dance teachers.

"Motoko did" Sosuke laughed.

Bitch is gonna die.

"No! He was just really sweet, we talked for a while and started seeing each other. Do NOT go have a crazy one night stand with Shaolin!" I shouted, waving my arms around like an idiot.

"I wasn't planning on it…but something tells me she'd be into that sort of thing…" Sosuke sighed. I stopped and thought about it. She was Yoruichi and Urahara's daughter after all.

Note to self…never think about Shaolin and her sex life again….

_That night, Ichigo and Rukia_

"YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT IT AREN'T YOU!" Rukia shouted at her husband.

"I need to vomit" Ichigo shivered. "Who knows what those perverted idiots have taught that girl…."

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_Entry 3_

So me and Riley had to work on our science project today, so she came over. We got up into my room and plopped down onto my bed, discovering Nisshoku sleeping underneath it. He got up and yawned, looking at us and laying back down. I shrugged and me and Riley started pulling our stuff out of our bags. We had to make animals out of food. Couldn't be that hard could it?

Well it is when two teenage shinigami with minimal cooking skills are stuck in the same room.

"We could make a… snake?" Riley suggested for the 5th time.

"NO! Everyone who can't cook is gonna make that!" I sighed. "You're freakin half fox you think of something!"

"Just because I'm half fox doesn't mean I'm any more artistic!" Riley growled. "We could make a…."

"Don't even say snake!" I groaned.

"How did you know?" Riley blinked. I slapped my forehead. Usually the rolls were reversed and I was making Riley slap her head, but Riley smacked her head into a poll today when we were fighting a hollow, and I think she had a concussion. I need to remember to take her to aunt Orihime later.

Wait…I just admitted I'm stupid….

Damnit

"I have an idea!" I shouted. "Mom has those chappy cake molds!"

"Is there anything chappy your mother doesn't have?" Riley asked. I stopped to think about it…

No, probably not.

We went downstairs and started baking our cakes…. Oh yes we were gonna get a good grade.

We named the creation…"our parents"

_Ichigo and Rukia_

"Rukia….there is a cake sitting on the counter of two rabbits fucking each other…" Ichigo sweat dropped.

"You know…I feel like Masaki's trying to tell us something…" Rukia contemplated. But then she shrugged. "My turn to be on top Ichigo" Rukia grinned. Ichigo smiled, and then frowned.

"Damn it" he growled, running after a giggling Rukia up the stairs.

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**so did you like it! PLEASE REVIEW! lol and if you have any ideas for future dairy entires ^ ^**

**thanks for reading and Im writing A Bond That Transcends Time right now! (this took me 20 minutes so dont get mad at me for wasting time)**


	2. Chapter 2: Visiting Uncle Byakun

**LOL Did all yall read the update of ABTTT?**

**We have some fun in this chapter, and like I've said this will update whenever i get ideas for it ^ ^ and it doesnt take long to write at all so it all good.**

**dont forget, this is a different universe than ABTTT, but same characters**

**I dont own bleach..... but i own this container of bleach! *hold up container of clorox***

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Visiting Uncle Byakuya

_Entry 4_

So mom and dad….ok just mom said that we have to go visit Uncle Byakuya. We've never visited Uncle Bya-kun at his house in the Soul Society before since we only just discovered that our parents are shinigami. He has always visited us.

Is it weird to think your uncles hot? Because he is.

Maybe I can join this Shinigami women's association thing while I'm there too.

Last time uncle Bya-kun came to visit he and dad got into an argument….there's a shock. Now don't get me wrong those two actually get along pretty well, or at least mom says they get along better than they did when he was my age. Daddy said that he was thinking about recruiting me into his squad after I graduated, but uncle Bya-kun wanted me in his squad.

Do I get a say in this? Because being in the same squad as Riley would be awesome. Not to mention having my captain and lieutenant making out all day doesn't sound that appealing.

We needed a new kitchen after that fight.

So we arrived in the soul society and I was shocked at how….old looking everything was! Seriously did they stay in the feudal era come on now!

So we walk to the 'Kuchiki Manor' what is he nobility or something? And when we got there these people were all bowing to my mom and glaring at my dad.

That's what you get for knocking up the 'Kuchiki princess' before marriage.

I gasped at the size of the giant house, and dad dragged me and Renji inside, seeing as how Kyoko happily followed mom and dad anywhere. Seriously they could walk into a volcano and she'd follow them. When we stepped in I saw my favorite Uncle in his shinigami uniform.

Is it bad to think that your uncle is UBER HOT.

Maybe I can visit Shuhei while I'm here.

Do they have potato chips in the Soul Society? Cuz I really have a craving for some Lays…

But I digress again, I really seem to be good at that. Uncle Byakuya smiled upon seeing us and hugged mom, then the 3 of us. Mom showed us to our rooms and Dad and Uncle Bya-kun started talking about something, probably Captain business.

It's still hard to believe Mom and Dad are so important, especially considering how dysfunctional they are.

Uncle Renji stopped by and offered to take me out training. Mom and Dad said they had some stuff to attend to at the Squad 14 barracks.

What kind of 'stuff'

Ya, I know them.

So Uncle Renji took me out to this training area within the Serietei and we drew our swords. He released his zanpaktou as did I. Kuroyuki, considered the second most beautiful zanpaktou in all of the Soul Society.

Ya, apparently mom has the most beautiful one.

But I'm not bitter about it or anything.

**(You'll find out what it looks like in a few chapters in ABTTT, but it needs to be a surprise, but you can probably tell what kind of abilities it will have)**

His sword came hurling towards me and I blocked it with mine, sending a wave of ice towards him. He raised his reiatsu and the ice melted.

Damnit

So we trained a while and I realized that I had A LOT of work to do, but he said the fact that I can release her is already amazing. But I'm not the prodigy that my father was.

Says you, what do you know there's a reason Aizen came after me.

We got back to the manor and I walked by my father and Uncle Byakuya talking. I decided to eavesdrop.

"There is no way you could ever get my sister to sleep with you in this household" Byakuya smirked.

There's a shocking conversation….your underestimating the sex drive of my parents uncle Bya-kun. That whole stopping aging thing apparently means their hormones don't change either.

At least that's how I justify my parent's never-ending lust for each other.

"I don't think she's worried about defiling your precious manor. And I know your sleeping with a certain pink haired lieutenant here" Dad smirked.

"It's her morals. I never told her she couldn't I just don't think she would" my uncle blushed.

Uncle Bya-kun blushing? Dad got him good.

"Bet which squad Masaki goes into on it?" Dad grinned.

"Your on."

DON'T I GET A SAY IN THIS DAMNIT

So I'm laying in bed that night, kinda half asleep when I start hearing something. But….Mom and Dad are on the other side of the manor…there's no way. But it sounded like moaning. I sat up and tried to listen.

I'm not a pervert shut up.

It started getting louder, and louder…then finally

"OH MY GOD ICHIGO!"

I fell face first into my bed.

DAMNIT

He apparently wanted to let the whole house know that HE won the bet that night.

I have to say Unlce Bya-kun's face at breakfast the next morning was priceless though. As was Dad's goofy grin. But then as revenge Uncle Bya-kun told mom about the bet.

Ya, she was pissed.

She promised abstinence for a week.

Guess how well that went…

_Ichigo and Rukia_

"Were we really that loud?" Ichigo asked.

"Well, considering Nii-sama knew about it before you said anything…" she glared.

"That just shows how awesome I am" Ichigo grinned.

"Should we be concerned that Masaki is commenting on our sex life?" Rukia asked.

"She never said we do it too much though, she was just commenting on how loud we were.

"I still don't know…" Rukia was cut off when Ichigo's lips met her necks, wrapping his arms around her from behind. "What was I saying?" she gasped.

"Something about Masaki" he replied.

"Oh…ya" she shot out in-between moans. "She joined the Shinigami Women's Association while we were there."

"Oh…" Ichigo stopped and stood straight. "SHE WHAT!"

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_Entry 5_

So Motoko, Shaolin, Riley and I all decided to go to the mall today.

Check for proper grammar usage!

So Motoko started dragging us into every store.

She reminds me so much of Auntie Rangiku it's scary.

So were in this one store in the mall, Motoko's looking at skirts, Riley's looking at shirts, Shaolin's looking at sportswear and I'm checking out the manga.

Did I mention this is one of those 'we have everything you can imagine' stores?

I really want a new series to read, something different, something that will make me search the internet for an update. Mom likes all those Shojo things, and I read a few but. Then I see it. _Dance in the Vampire Bund. _I pick it up and start looking through it…yes this is exactly what I'm looking for! A vampire werewolf love story, but so not that horrible disgusting Twilight shit! Not to mention the werewolf is hot and the vampire princess kicks ass apparently.

I buy a few volumes and we make our way to another store and we all decide to try on sun dresses.

I must say I look amazing in purple.

Riley bought this really cute blue one, Shaolin yellow and Motoko finding that pink goes surprisingly well with her white hair.

We get to the food court and are eating when these guys come up to us and start flirting.

Curse our good looks.

"What are you ladies doing later" the middle one asked.

"We're going to go sword fighting" Shaolin nonchalantly replied. It wasn't a lie either we were planning on training later.

"Oh really? We happen to be world class sword fighters" one of the guys said.

And I'm the queen of Massachusetts.

Riley stood and walked up to one of the guys, pulling up her shirt to expose a healing scar on the stomach. She got hit by a hollow a few nights back and the wound was healing slowly. It was a long red gash that she didn't bother to cover at all. "Where's your battle scars" she glared, knowing this would scare them off.

"CRAZY BITCH!" the leader shouted, waving the others to run off. Riley smirked and sat back down.

"You know usually the tattoos are enough to scare off the men Riley" Motoko laughed. Riley smirked and ate her food again.

We all came to my house and put our stuff down, exiting our bodies and getting ready to go to Urahara's place for training.

"Ichigo, do we have any plans tonight?" I heard my mother ask.

"Only the usual" he nonchalantly replied.

The usual….what on earth could that be I wonder.

"Aside from that stupid."

"No, not that I know of why?"

"Well, the kids are all staying at Urahara's tonight, so Renji and Sia invited us over."

Me and Riley's faces went white. We had heard the story. We had no idea if it was true, but we had heard it.

My ears are bleeding, and I have images running through my mind that will never be erased.

_Ichigo and Rukia_

"You know I'm really surprised she doesn't hide this better" Rukia laughed.

"Why are there so many dirty men all over my little girl" Ichigo growled. Rukia gave him a look of annoyance.

"She's a beautiful 17 year old girl Ichigo, she's gonna have men making advances."

"I don't trust men" Ichigo glared, crossing his arms and huffing.

"Why not?"

"I'm a man aren't I? I would never want someone like me around my daughter" Ichigo smirked. Rukia rolled her eyes.

"But I like you that way" she purred seductively.

"That's what makes it even scarier; she is your daughter after all…"

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_Entry 6_

So it's family night. And yes before you say anything we do have family bonding night.

More like me Renji and Kyoko do something and mom and dad…

You understand by now don't you creeper reading this?

You know I've only just now realized that I write this as though someone is going to read it. Mom and Dad probably are though so here's to you…

GET A FUCKING ROOM

But I digress. So we were all in the living room gathered around the table playing spoons.

……my family gets violent playing spoons.

Kyoko grabbed the pen in the center and we all made a mad dash. Mom and Dad grabbed the last one at the same time.

Let the death match begin.

Mom jumped over to Dad's side of the table (I can't promise there was no ulterior motive) and they started fighting for it. The cap came off and they were both left with half a pen.

Let the who actually won argument begin.

So after a patch job on my father (remember now mom's pregnant so she had an unfare advantage in that Dad won't hit her back, and it's given her super human strength.) We decided to have family story time.

Mom told the story of how when Renji was a baby he swallowed a bee…and we only then discovered that he was allergic when it stung him in the stomach.

Wow….he was even stupid back then.

Then it was Dad's turn.

"Well…I remember when Masaki was two…" damn it dad…. " and we went to that one year high school reunion…"

"Wait….you had a one year reunion?" I asked bewildered. He laughed and nodded.

"I thought it was stupid too, but Rukia kicked me" he glared.

"I wanted to go!" she huffed, crossing her arms like a 4 year old.

"ANYWAY" he groaned. "Everyone there thought she was the most precious thing ever. You still had hip length hair, but it was up in pigtails, and you were in this cute little pink dress Uryu made you for your birthday. The entire time you wouldn't leave my side" he laughed. I frowned.

"You seriously stayed next to me the whole night. Your mother would try to take you to see people and you would grab my pant leg and hide. Then at one point I had to hold you for 20 minutes when Keigo got wasted… stupid Keigo" Dad laughed. "I had to punch him and hold you at the same time" he laughed.

"She was such a little Daddy's girl back then" Mom laughed.

"She still is" Dad returned the laugh.

"AM NOT!" I roared.

"Ok, so why do you have to go see all scary movies with him" Mom asked slyly.

"He'll protect me from the creepers in the theatre!" I answered defensively.

"Why do have to take you to the dentist every time?" Dad grinned.

"That dentist is going to kill me one day I'm convinced of it!" I pointed.

"How come you always ask him for everything?" Mom asked.

"Because he knows what I'm talking about!" I roared. Mom has lived here permanently since I was born, and still had a hard time with DVD players!

"Just admit it" They laughed.

"NEVER!" I shouted, storming off to my room. I slammed the door and opened up my laptop. The screen is a picture of me and my dad when I was 5 at the zoo…

……GOD FUCKING DAMNIT!

_Ichigo and Rukia_

"She's like that because you're such a good dad" Rukia smiled.

"I know, I've heard that before" Ichigo sighed dramatically.

"Oh Ichigo we have a shinigami women's association meeting tomorrow" Rukia added.

"And being the amazing father I am SHE'S NOT GOING!"

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**LOL i hope yall liked it!**

**Banana**


	3. Chapter 3: Shinigami Women's Association

**^ ^ so before i wrote ABTTT I thought I'd update this since I had a few ideas. The first entry is basically crack but then its funny again ^ ^**

**and for those who dont read BBF, I finished High School this week!**

**So ABTTT is next to update, but who knows how long that will take, I don't have any idea where to start like i usually do, but I'll figure it out pretty quick dont worry :)**

**But i do have the sudden urge to play digimon world 3...**

**IMPORTANT!: Remember, Same Characters as ABTTT, different story though**

**I don't own Bleach...blah blah, but I do own my OC's ^ ^ dont I? Or is this all part of Aizen's plan to fool me into thinking I won my OC's?**

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Shinigami Women's Association

_Entry 7_

So ok my first Shinigami women's association meeting was today.

Mom had to bribe dad to get him to let me go.

Take a wild guess what the bribe was…..

Well you're wrong (for once). She told him that she would make him chocolate brownies. Daddy has a thing for chocolate. And mommy knows it, so she only buys chocolate when she wants something…. Or when she wants some good foreplay…

Don't ask why I know that, I really don't wanna talk about it.

So me, Motoko, Shaolin and Riley were sitting at the table in the Kuchiki Manor along with our mother's and a bunch of other high ranking women shinigami. For some reason there aren't many low ranking shinigami here. Auntie Yachiru…

Ok you're probably really confused. I call everyone in the little 'circle of friends' if you will aunt or uncle. And then of course Bya-kun is my uncle. And as weird as it may seem… he's fucking Yachiru. Don't ask me why because I don't know, but they are so cute together!

So anyway, Auntie Yachiru stood to start the meeting.

"So ok, today we are going to talk about relationships. Specifically, I want to know about the married women's lives before the children or marriage if you wanna go back that far" she giggled.

I hate that woman…..

"Hmmm…well I remember before me and Toshi got together I was always flirting with him" Auntie Rangiku grinned.

"But mom….you still do that…" Motoko sweatdropped.

"True, but I was relentless in my teasing. I was always squishing his head between my boobs, glomping him, then I would tease him about his height and half strip in the office and…."

"Mom…." Motoko interrupted again.

"Yes sweetie?" she asked genuinely curious.

"You still do all those things…" Motoko sighed.

"But I'm not at the best part yet!" Auntie Rangiku grinned. "So one day I was doing my usual flirting, and it was really hot out. I kinda did my expose myself move in front of Toshi and went to sit down at the desk and possibly ignore my paperwork. I pulled some paperwork and actually started doing it when I felt a pair of arms wrap around me. I froze and noticed this hot breath breathing in my ear. I'll never forget what he said that day" Auntie Rangiku smiled dreamily, fluttering her eyelids.

"What's that Mama!" Motoko asked, expecting some sort of epic love story.

"I hope you're ready for it, because its 95 degrees out, and your clothes would look much better on the floor Rangiku." Motoko fell to the floor.

"That's the most unromantic thing I've ever heard!" Motoko jumped up and shouted.

"Really?" Auntie Rangiku blinked. "Because it worked and we've been together ever since" she smiled.

If I didn't think Auntie Rangiku was weird then…. I do now.

But what puzzles me is that that doesn't sound like something Uncle Toshiro would say…. It sounds more like something…..daddy would say….

"Well that was unexpected" Nanao coughed. "How about you Rukia?" she asked genuinely curious.

Oh dear god….

"Hehe" mom evilly laughed. I can already tell where this is going. "Well, it was late, like 1 in the morning, and me and Ichigo had just gotten back from fighting hollows…"

"Mom can I leave now…" I groaned. She glared at me and threw her chappy pen at me. When mom throws Chappy anything, you know she's on the brink of losing it. So I sank into my chair and politely listened to the nauseating story that was to follow.

"Ok….. so there were a bunch of hollows, and me and Ichigo got beat up pretty badly. And truth be told I had had feelings for him for a while, but I never acted on them. I went to the closet to fetch the bandages I always kept in there and turned around. That was when I knew…"

I mentally slapped myself for getting so caught up in this thing.

"He had taken his shirt off, he was hot, sweaty and covered in blood. I had seen him shirtless plenty of times before, but for some reason this time… it was so different. I could feel the arousal heating up inside, it was so hard not to jump him! Then he turned to me and said 'I'll fix your wounds if you fix mine.' I nodded and went over to him, sitting down on the bed and started wrapping his wounds. His warm skin underneath my fingers…. It was so inviting but I knew I couldn't. I finished and he turned to me, and I knew I would have to take my shirt off. I figured it wouldn't be an issue for him either since he had seen my topless before as well. I turned around and he started wrapping my wounds. His large strong arms wrapped around me with the bandage, I could feel his soft hands as they fluttered past my stomach. I shivered, wondering what he would do if he knew how much it was affecting me. I could feel his hot breath on my neck as he leaned forward again. I wanted to spin around and take him so badly! But then…. I felt his arms wrap around me and pull me in. I was so shocked my body froze. His lips were right against my ear and he practically purred."

"I may be a wonderfully innocent young boy…. But with a beautiful young woman living in my closet, topless and bleeding in the moonlight right in front of me….even I only have so much self restraint."

I bashed my head into the table. "You people are the most ridiculous bunch of people I've ever heard off!" I shouted. "There's no romance here only pure sexual desire that happened to turn into love! What the hell is wrong with you people!"

"But Masaki we've been together ever since, and we did love each other we were just too afraid to say it" Mom argued.

"Same here, Toshi was just so shy, but when a man gets turned on they'll usually act on it" Auntie Rangiku grinned.

"Ulqui-chan did the same thing. It was so weird considering it was Ulquiorra, but he just lost it one day and I loved every second of it" Auntie Orihime blushed. My mouth dropped. Even Uncle Ulquiorra did this kind of crap! He's like one of the most unemotional and blank people I've ever met!

"Me and Kisuke are both like that….good times" Auntie Yoruichi grinned. I wasn't shocked by that I saw it coming.

"Uryu did the same thing…well almost" Auntie Nemu blushed. "He's not really that type, but he didn't really tell me romantically he liked me… we were in the lab doing an experiment and he just kissed me. Uryu is so sweet though, I had to push him further" she blushed again.

What the hell is wrong with these people….

I should have listened to dad and went to the movies with him Renji and Kyoko….

"Byakuya kissed me on a whim one night" Auntie Yachiru rested her chin in her hand. This made everyone spit out their tea.

Is insanity genetic?

Because Shuhei told me my eyes were pretty and invited me to go kill hollows with him….

"Grimmjow was watching me knit one day. I think he was more staring at the ball of yarn but… it just happened" Auntie Nel grinned.

"What about you mom" Riley asked Auntie Sia. "You're a fox woman how did dad fall for you?"

I had always wondered this….

"Sake…..lot's of sake for both of us" Auntie Sia blushed.

"Are me and Chad the only normal people here?" Aunt Tatsuki groaned.

THANK GOD SOMEONES NORMAL

"It was the third date before we did it" she smiled.

I don't remember anything after that….because I fainted.

_Ichigo and Rukia_

"That was probably the best night ever" Ichigo grinned. "But I can't believe you'd tell her that."

"So she and Shuhei aren't sleeping together apparently" Rukia sighed in relief.

"She never said that…." Ichigo glared. "I'm onto him…."

* * *

_Entry 8_

I'm in deep shit today….

I got my Calculus Test back today…..

I got a 57% on it….

Ok it's not that I'm retarded or anything. On the contrary I'm actually really smart like mom and dad. But seriously Calculus is the stupidest thing ever! Why do I need to know how to take the integral of a log function? I'm going to be a shinigami when I graduate I don't need this!

But then of course there's Riley…who is freakin acing Calc. Seriously, how does it come so easily to her!

I think my teacher thinks I'm retarded too. That's always fun….

So at lunch today I was throwing my pity party, aka laying face down on the roof sobbing as everyone else ate.

"Daddy is gonna be so disappointed!" I cried. I felt Ryuji put a comforting hand on my back and rub it.

"There there Masaki…your dad isn't going to kill you over one calculus test" he tried to reassure me.

"No that's what your dad would do Ryuji" Hiro laughed. I could feel Ryuji tense up.

"Did you at least study?" Satoru asked. I nodded into the ceiling.

"Than it shouldn't be an issue should it?" Motoko asked. "If I study and bomb a test my parents just tell me to try harder next time" she said in her bubbly voice.

"That's because there's no hope for you Motoko" Sosuke quipped. "You have your mother's beauty and your mother's brain's as well."

"What was that Sosuke!" she barked back.

I can just imagine the scene behind me. Sosuke and Motoko are arguing. Hiro and Ryuji are arguing. Riley and Shaolin are gossiping probably and Satoru is quietly drinking a juicebox.

If I was right it would be awesome.

Were mom dad and the others like this when they were in school?

"Just chill, it shouldn't have dropped your grade that much" Riley sighed.

"Says the Calc genius" I sobbed more.

"Just tell them how hard it is. I don't know about Aunt Rukia but I know your dad took calc" Riley tried to comfort.

"Except dad's a genius!" I reminded her. "He was Salutatorian only behind Uncle Uryu!"

I've always wondered where my dad's brains went after high school.

"Well regardless he won't kill you. You're his precious baby girl after all" she laughed, sipping her own juicebox.

"But if he kills me he'll still have Kyoko" I reminded.

"Oh ya…. Never mind you're fucked" I just knew she was smiling. I groaned again.

I got home and threw my backpack on the couch as usual, before remembering the horrible test that was inside with my Calc homework…

"Oh shit!" I scrambled, grabbing it and running upstairs to my bedroom. I threw it on my bed and flopped down, groaning. Once again I found Nisshoku chilling on my bed. He looked up at me and yawned.

"Promise not to tell dad Nisshoku" I asked him. He looked at me with those soulful loyal eyes of his. Rottweiler's get such a bad rap. "I totally bombed my Calc test….but you can! not! Tell dad. Or mom. They'll kill me! They'll break off all contact with Shuhei, they'll make me stop fighting….. THEY'LL TAKE AWAY CHAPPY! I'm so screwed!" I cried again. "At least I have you Nisshoku" I smiled. He promptly got up and jumped off the bed, walking out of the room.

I should have figured he'd betray me. He's dad's loyal follower after all.

"Traitor!" I shouted, burying my head into my pillow again.

Ok, I have an hour or two before mom and dad get back from work. So I have about 3 hours until their hormones return to normal from all day 'working' all day in the barracks. I need a good excuse or something so that I don't die.

Incase you people don't understand. I've NEVER bombed a test before. Not to mention I'm running in the top 10 right now and I need to keep that going!

(**I wish I was that smart…..)**

"Ok…. I'll tell them that I was fighting hollows the night before with Riley and got hit in the head. I got a mild concussion and couldn't focus during the test that day. Ya that'll work! Now I just gotta call Riley and get her to lie for me, but she will, she's my best friend!" I grabbed my chappy the rabbit cell phone and hit the speedial for Riley.

"Yeah" she yawned, probably taking a nap.

"Ok, I'm gonna tell mom and dad that I was fighting hollows with you and got a concussion. If they call will you confirm it for me?" I plead.

"No" she yawned again, and I heard the phone click. I froze and dropped my phone.

"BITCH!" I shouted, throwing my phone into the wall. I crossed my arms then thought about what I just did…. "AWWW DAMNIT!" I shouted, running to my phone and praying to Kami it wasn't broken.

"Ok" I exhaled, "Maybe Sosuke will do it." I hit his speedial and heard the phone ringing.

"I'm playing Uno with Mimi this better be important" I heard him growl.

"She's kicking your ass isn't she" I laughed. Oh shit that wasn't a good idea.

Click

"AWW DAMNIT NOT YOU TOO!" I cried. I was running out of ideas fast.

"Motoko" she sang as she answered the phone.

"Ok, If I tell mom and dad that I was injured fighting hollows with you and that's why I bombed the test would you back me up?" I asked desperately.

"Only if you give me the details on you and Shuhei" she asked excitedly.

This time I hung up.

Ok, I'm doomed, I'll make something up at dinner I guess.

So at dinner the 5 of us were sitting there. Renji was telling us about his day at school, him and Ichigo got in trouble again for yelling at nothing…. But it was a ghost.

When will they learn that most people don't see ghosts….

The Kyoko talked about day care at Auntie Yuzu's. Apparently Mimi and her built a giant sandcastle.

Dad's smile was sickening. Seriously he has such a soft spot for us girls. He calls us his little angels, and Renji his little demon. It's a true story though…..

To bad his little angel failed a Calc test…

"So Masaki how was your day" Mom asked. I gulped.

"Fi…fine" I stuttered. I usually don't lie, to my parents anyway.

"Ok what happened" Dad glared. Damn that man for knowing me so well!

"Nothing why would you say that" I asked quickly, a goofy grin plastered on my face.

"Masaki…." He glared. I lost….

"I….failed my Calc test" I muttered.

"Define failed" my mom asked as she took a bite of her rice.

"57%" I groaned.

"Did you study?" My dad asked, repeating my mom's actions.

"Yeah…" I sighed.

"Then don't worry about it just get some extra help or something" Dad said.

My life is over he's gonna….

Wait…

He just said don't worry about it…

"I'm not dead?" I asked stunned.

"Well you are a shinigami" both mom and dad reply.

"I thought you guys would kill me!" I shouted.

"Damn I did too" Renji muttered.

Remind me to kill the little bastard later.

"If you studied and did all you could then we have no reason to be mad" Dad replied. Mom nodded.

"Not to mention I never got to Calc….but your father wasn't that good at it" Mom giggled, dad broke his chop sticks.

"Why would I ever need to know how to take the integral of a log function seriously I'm a freakin shinigami!" he barked.

I blame him now….

_Ichigo and Rukia_

"Aww look Ichi" she said the same thing you did!" Rukia cooed.

"She's a chip off the old block eh?" Ichigo proudly grinned.

"Ichi….when you were 17…." Rukia sweatdropped. Ichigo got the hint.

"SHE BETTER NOT BE!"

* * *

_Entry 9_

Ok, so after I heard dad's explosion last night when he assumed me and Shuhei were sleeping together I have decided to better hide this thing. But now the question has arisen…

Where the hell should I hide it.

I didn't care before, but if I ever do end up writing something incriminating in this thing I don't want them to find it….

So I started by putting it behind the Wii in my room.

Then I remembered that Dad snatches it all the time for the livingroom.

Damnit….

Ok, so then I hid it underneath my pillow…

20 minutes later Nisshoku flopped onto my bed and knocked my pillow and the diary off the bed. Damnit….

My underwear drawer…

Mom puts my laundry away…..

Ok….I'll hide this in a totally hilarious and unexpected spot! In between the couch cushions!

_Ichigo and Rukia_

Dear Masaki

We have discovered your Diary in the cushions while we were making…. Watching television…. And have decided to tell you about our day…

So ok (Dad) I was sitting in the office today filling out some paperwork on new recruits…which in case you've ever wondered sucks ass and Ulquiorra walked in.

"Captain, I'm afraid to inform you that there is a captains meeting today at 3" he said in the dull way of his.

"You should be nicer to him Ichigo he's your 3rd seat after all"

Shut Up Rukia….and how the hell are you writing too?

"Don't worry about it just continue."

Fine… so I left the squad to your mother and went to the captains meeting. It was boring…more shit on finances and how many new recruits are learning Shikai etc.

But then Kenpachi said something stupid which pissed off Soi Fon, who in turn upset Ukitake into a coughing fit, which pissed of Kyoraku. Kyoraku accidently stepped on Komamura's foot, and he yelped, hurting Kurotsuchi's over sensitive hearing. He starts screaming and this pisses off Byakuya, who since he's Byakuya took it out on me. I in turn started yelling back, pissing off Toshiro. So we're all yelling at each other and things are getting really ugly, when Unohana walks to the center of the room.

"Please be quiet everyone" she asked. However everyone totally ignored her. She glared in that way only she can… "Please be quiet everyone…" she repeated.

I swear I wet myself. She scares the shit out of me sometimes….

So we settled that and left and I went drinking with Renji and your boyfr….

Hi sweetie this is your mom, Ichigo just broke his pencil when he went to write boyfriend. He really doesn't like you dating Shuhei for some reason. I don't know why… he's a nice boy. It could be that he's a flirt. It could be that he drinks…a lot. It could be that he's older than me, or it could be that he has 69 tattooed on his face. But really I have no idea.

So anyway when your dad left I went to do some paperwork. I was bored out of my skull until Nel showed up with Orihime.

"Shouldn't you two be doing something?" I asked. I thought Nel was training and Orihime was working in the 4th today.

"This is something" Nel yawned as she flopped down on the couch.

And we wonder why nothing gets done.

"I got no sleep last night!" Nel groaned. "I think Grimmjow found some catnip or something…" I tried not to laugh at the image of your uncle on catnip…. I then looked at Orihime, who was in the same state.

"Ulquiorra didn't find any catnip did he?" I smirked.

"Food…..poisoning….." she groaned….

I knew those weird meals would get her one day.

So the meeting let out and Nii-sama came to visit and I assumed that your dad went out with the guys.

"I have a problem I need your help with" Nii-sama asked.

"And that would be?"

"Yachiru….."

"Yes?"

"Is…. Late…"

I spat out my tea.

"Wait what!" I shouted. He sighed and nodded.

"How block headed are you!" I shout.

"Almost as much as you and that husband of yours are…"

Touché

So I told him to wait and see what happened, and then I told your father when he got back. You can imagine how hard he started laughing….

Ok your fathers back, were gonna go, have fun at school tomorrow sweetie we love you lots =3

Your father says he loves you more, but it's a lie.

He said no its not….but it is…

Damnit Ichigo I'm going to kill you….

You may wake up fatherless tomorrow….

_Masaki the next Day_

"You know…he didn't die last night…. But I woke up to some odd noises…"

* * *

**did everyone like it =3 I like writing it ^ ^**

**Oh ok, to whoever this DUDE and Pissed Fangirl person is who keeps sending Anomyous reviews threatening me into updating ABTTT... KNOCK IT OFF! SeRIOUSLY I cant message you back because you dont sign in or anything. My life as much as you dont want it to includes other things than writing. Not to mention I have a few other stories i write that need updating too. So dont go around reviewing my other stories and calling them stupid peices of shit saying i need to update ABTTT before you fucking kick my ass all the way to the moon. I'll update when I get to it and your just going to have to wait!**

**Not to mention id like to see you try to kick my ass**

**But aside from that, I hate the Chicago Blackhawks with every fiber of my being, almost as much as I hate Ichihime, so go Flyers! and ill see you in my next update!**


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